Year of the Inner Goddess

March 2024 – Audio Version

My insides felt like limp spaghetti noodles trapped in a dishwasher’s wash cycle, just flopping around in turbulent conditions. Very little seemed to soothe my midriff, not vitamins, pacing, or changing my clothes three times. Even Jack’s patient reassurances were disregarded in my stormy upheaval. Sometimes, one must live through a novel experience before all doubt and anxiety can be released. 

“What were we thinking?!” I wailed to my Inner Goddess. “We have invited the Lieutenant to meet here—at the house! There is no place for me to escape or politely leave. What were we thinking?!?” 

Clothed in floor-length petal pink lingerie, she sat patiently on her chaise, filing an already pristine nail. I marveled. How could I be two such different entities? One part of me was a literal nervous wreck who kept disappearing into the back room, unsure she could keep her breakfast down. The other part of me was tickled to her core, buoyant and heady over the actuality of having a long-held MFM fantasy come true!

“Stop pacing!!” My exasperated Inner Goddess exclaimed as she rubbed her temples. “We have a plan: mimosas and conversation, and we’ll go from there.” 

My Inner Goddess made it all sound so simple and straightforward: one step after the other, inhale, exhale, pace. Still, my thoughts raced. I had no previous contact with the Lieutenant; Jack was the ringmaster of my fancies. What if the Lieutenant’s pictures were outdated? Would he be kind? What if he took one look at me and ran? What if it was awkward for everyone? The “what ifs” darted about my mind like trapped swallows. 

Jack, ever sensitive to my inner turmoil, suggested a show, to which I heartily assented—anything to quail the riot of emotions twisting my organs. Together, we nestled on the couch while I sipped my tea. The bone china cup gave a merry clink when I returned it to the saucer. Outside, sunlight streamed in cheery beams. It was a radiant Sunday morning. The show flickered before us, and my heart began to settle until…

Ping. 

Jack’s phone chirped blithely. The Lieutenant announced his arrival. The monstrous lump in my throat prevented me from speaking, and I mutely motioned toward the front door, urging Jack to greet our guest. My Inner Goddess elbowed me in the ribs with a look mandating I pull myself together, “or else!” Before I could ponder the implications of what “or else” could be, the Lieutenant entered Jack’s abode, saluting him with a firm handshake. I gulped and tried not to stare as I extended my hand in hospitality. 

The Lieutenant was everything his profile and pictures had promised, though they did not do his dazzling smile justice. He was blonde, exceptionally tall (my Inner Goddess bit her lip and moaned a little), and had a compact handclasp that spoke volumes about his character. However, the most striking physical feature was the Lieutenant’s dazzling eyes. Even in the brilliant morning light, I had trouble settling on their exact color. His account stated blue, but as I gazed into their charming depth, I witnessed a kaleidoscope of twinkling blue stars, whispers of crystalline glaciers, and the resilience of Germanic ancestry. My cheeks flushed at their intensity, and I hoped I had not stared obnoxiously. 

The gentlemen chatted amiably as I mixed the mimosas, grateful for an occupying task. Feeling fancy or perhaps to give myself a bit more to do, I add a dash of grenadine and elderflower liquor to mine. We “cheered,” our glasses giving a faint clink as they touched before relocating to the living room. 

Situated in the middle of the couch, I listened, sipped, and conversed with the Lieutenant on my right and my doting Jack on the left. The Lieutenant proved himself witty, articulate, and so well-spoken that I imagined we could have happily chatted at length. Nevertheless, my Inner Goddess was wildly impatient. She had forgone her morning cavorting, delaying it for the impending dual fulfillment, and as the seconds passed, she grew peevish at the delay. 

Yet, she was as stumped as I was about negotiating or enticing the two gentlemen to the bedroom if the Lieutenant was even interested! Though actively engaged in what I had to say, I was unsure if the Lieutenant wished for more. My usually acute senses were too wrapped up in their insecurity. I wished I was insightful and sapient, astute to body language, and more attuned to kinesic mannerisms. I sighed inwardly, excusing myself. Once alone, the gentlemen would have to reach an agreement on the proceedings and set about their actualization. I stepped away, leaving the situation in Jack’s capable hands, while feeling slightly guilty for my lack of courage. I was a strong, independent woman, too timid to take each gentleman by the hand and lead them to the bedroom as my Inner Goddess yearned to do. I shook my head, promising myself I would grow through my mousiness. 

On my return, I avoided my seat, choosing to remain standing, indicating my readiness. Though compelling, the conversation continued, and I eventually returned to my seat as my Inner Goddess fretted. Perhaps I was too much? Not enough? Had I laughed too loudly or missed blatant clues? I sighed. Being a woman was decidedly complicated. Or maybe I was just too complex. 

My Inner Goddess beseeched me to interrupt the dialog and drag them to the bedroom, not 50 paces away. Proper ladylike decorum forbade this in no uncertain terms. Besides, what would Jack think of such brazen behavior?

At last, Jack rose and excused himself. I probed the profundity of Jack’s eyes, searching for answers. Would he beckon me to join him for a word, sharing a hesitation or red flags? What was I to do?? His coruscating hazel eyes acknowledged my queries and glimmered as they indicated his endorsement to proceed as I wished. My Inner Goddess gleefully jumped up and down on her plush velvet chaise. Okay…here we go!

I turned toward the Lieutenant, melting a little in the ardor of those diaphanous blue eyes. My memory is weak in the eroticism of the subsequent moments. I remember his lips on mine, certain and unhesitating but without an air of insolent overconfidence. My vision dissolved as I drank in the firmness of his body, the heat of his need, and the desires surging and seducing my Inner Goddess. Gods of Olympus, she wanted this. 

A baritone chuckle disrupted the spell. “I see you guys are getting better acquainted.”

I broke our kiss and opened my eyes to discover I was astride the Lieutenant’s lap. How and when did that happen? Darn, my impossible Inner Goddess and her impudent possession of my body. In all honesty, I could not be vexed with her. I rather liked being in the strapping Lieutenant’s lap. I felt small and feminine against his hearty, athletic body, and the way he held me made my body wish I were naked and able to experience the intimacy of skin-on-skin contact.

Just then, I detected a trembling in the Lieutenant’s legs beneath me. It was only slight but enough to send flashing warnings to my empathic mind. Behind me, Jack was in the kitchen, preparing another round of mimosas and gathering a few water bottles for the bedroom. I cupped the Lieutenant’s strong jawline and murmured my assurances we had proceeded far enough if he wished to pause or discontinue. There were no expectations, no strings. It indeed was a pleasure to meet him. The Lieutenant’s hands tightened around my waist as he resoundingly asserted all was well, just a bit of nerves. I tenderly kissed him, first on the lips and again on his high cheekbone, willing my magic to assuage his uneasiness yet taking comfort that I was not alone in my nervousness. In fact, girded by our collective jitters, I slipped from his lap and bid him follow me into the bedroom. To my heart’s relief, armed with fluids, Jack had stationed himself in the dimly lit recesses of his sanctuary, waiting for us. His cunning smile rivaled the sun, relaxing my heart and piquing my Inner Goddess’ insatiable need.

The Lieutenant’s well-fitted clothes did a marvelous job concealing the extent of the ripped and strapping body beneath the cotton. I gasped inaudibly as he disrobed before me and held myself a little straighter. The specimen before me was a fine testament to the military’s scouting for the best of the best. Robust shoulders, muscle-bound arms, and a carved abdomen flowed into molded thighs that insinuated nimble agility. I blushed, reinforcing my spine and cinching my midriff a wee bit tighter. 

Meanwhile, my Inner Goddess was hurling ahead. Images of leaping into his arms, wrapping my legs around the Lietenant’s staunch waist, and devouring him danced in my head. Thankfully, I was saved from embarrassing myself by brawny, familiar arms wrapping around my naked waist. 

My Jack had undressed with shocking speed and now converged himself and his straining glory against my back. I grinned and sighed into his intimate embrace, taking impish joy in the growing slickness on my spine. His sinewy hands encircled my nakedness, tracing the outlines of my narrow waist and adorned breasts. I wiggled my derriere, indicating my happiness. This incited his girth to new heights, so I devilishly wiggled again. I tipped my chin over my shoulder, head inclined, reaching for My Love’s lips and then melting as his soul claimed what was his. 

What followed cannot be adequately detailed on this forum nor conveyed in their supreme euphoria. Words are pitiful when it comes to representing what transpired, and descriptions fall short of what must be witnessed in person. How can I attempt to sufficiently pin a fantasy, laying bare the hedonistic lust for all to celebrate? My Inner Goddess insists I do my best for our own licentious recollection. 

Novel hands, unknown and curious, shadowed My Love’s wandering fingers. The Lieutenant pressed his commanding form against my front. Instantly, giddy delirium transformed my knees to the consistency of unset jello, and I feared to open my eyes lest the heat and significance of the moment overwhelm me. I hoped the gentlemen sandwiching me did not realize how much I depended on their compression to keep me upright. Four hands, twice the size of my own, indulged my whims and roved my form. Lips nuzzled my neck, raising tiny goosebumps at my nape. Trapped between two ostentatious glories, my breath came in short, desperate gasps as I tried to mirror their hands and not concede to the lavish attention they bestowed.

I wholly succumbed to the erotism, permitting my Inner Goddess to provocatively slither and wriggle our naked bodies together as my hands roved the muscular god behind me and then the one before me. Then, one hand on each! After this brief interaction, my Inner Goddess knew she would never be the same. Having tasted the intoxicant ambrosia of an MFM, my tantalized Inner Goddess was keen to emphasize the fact that this would not be the last time she was the center of twin feral domination.

I was prone on the bed, though I am helpless to say whether I floated, walked, or was carried there. All I could comprehend was the swelling rapture, coursing like living currents of electricity through every fiber of my being. Through some unspoken understanding, a gentleman positioned themselves, one fore and one aft of my recumbent but already panting body. Assured hands spread my hesitant thighs while a second set compelled my chin to tilt northward, and eager lips sought my reciprocation. 

Now exposed to the light of day and the honeyed breath of a new lover, my slit began to moisten in earnest, and my opal pearl nearly vibrated with need. The skilled Lieutenant was appreciatively not one for games and denial and bent his great head between my thighs. A rush of orgasmic waves jetted through me at the contact of his virtuoso tongue. My toes curled and uncurled involuntarily as the mushrooming force surged through my body, exiting my throat in a ruckus cry of liberation. I worried my deafening exclamation would distract and repel the aristocratic Lieutenant. My Inner Goddess rejoiced to discover that the Lieutenant stayed the course and honed and adjusted his ministrations, eliciting wail after wail as I suffocated in my bliss.

Aplifhying the encounter was Jack’s assertive and hypnotic involvement. Each breast was exhaustively adored, rigorously suckled, and assiduously massaged to each orb’s paramount delight. Passionate kisses stole my breath before outlining my elegant neck, nibbling over my throat, and settling in the embellished valley betwixt my bosom. What did I ever do to receive such worship?

All the while, my soul rose and fell in unparalleled jubilation. Incomprehensibly, the Lieutenant’s protected granite expanded my rhapsody and sealed my fate. Afraid to mar his perfect creamy skin, my fingernails ruthlessly bit into the tender tissue of my palms as my frenzy consumed my mind, soul, and flesh. I arched into the brutal assault, welcoming the intense persecution of his bulbous ridge on my inner jewel. I savored the Lieutenant’s stalwart weight, crushing me to the mattress as he labored for my benefit. I felt petite and utterly feminine beneath his divine frame, the realization sending tsunami waves tearing through my Inner Goddess. 

At a brief adjournment, while the Lieutenant thrust slowly, steadily, I cast my eyes about for my Beloved. Thankfully, he had remained close, or else my bleary eyes might not have been able to detect his presence. Ever, my voyeuristic companion, Jack, had fetched his mobile device and documented my animated disintegration into covetous fervor. I grinned and gave him a wicked wink. Now we had something to view later, perhaps as I rode him before capitulating to my torrent of heavenly agony.

The Lieutenant yielded to Jack, sipping his water as Jack nearly drove beyond the confines of my responsive and hypersensitive cocoon with unrivaled determination. I cried out at the familiar barrage, muscles straining at the impact. His wolfish body became a blur of inhuman aggression, launching my Inner Goddess into the heavens, her wings outstretched as her eyes reflected the luminous light of the galactic stars. 

Concurrently, the Lieutenant placed himself at my head, reiterating Jack’s former reverence of my upper body and lips. Massive hands kneaded each breast, taking care to focus on each pert nipple in turn. Masterful fingers slipped into the soft tendrils of my hair, eventually gripping with careful intensity. Still lost in Jack’s forceful penetration, I managed to cover the Lieutenant’s hand, inciting him to seize the curls in a black-hearted hold. My echoing response assured him all was well. 

Manhandled onto all four, I called for a pause, gasping, “Wait, wait.” 

The concern felt palpable, and never before had hands relinquished me so quickly. My Inner Goddess was shocked and instantly felt the hollow loss of their touch. I tried to articulate my request but found my vowels clashing with my consonants, my words coming out in incomprehensible gibberish. Water magically appeared in my hand, the cool river slicking my parched throat. I felt rather exposed, my derriere on absurd display, but all my body cared about was the clear liquid sating my withered tongue. 

“Ramp.” This time, my words were more coherent. Well, one word made it out. Not “please” or “can we use.” Nope, just “ramp.”

Thankfully, Jack understood my meaning. You should have seen his face as recognition dawned. I thought it might split in two at my erotic request. As the Lieutenant patiently waited behind me, hands resting on my waist, Jack moved off the bed in a flash and retrieved the Liberator Ramp, positioning it beneath me with the narrow tip sloping toward my head. 

My fingers crimped the corners of the stout foam as I lowered my chest and head to rest on the warm velvet, displaying my hips provocatively. The Lieutenant indubitably understood the assignment. Hands gripped my hips, fingers curling around my hipbones as his stiff prominence invaded my sanctum, causing me to unravel and dissipate into the abyss of nothingness as my need transfixed my body. Jack took the opportunity to satisfy yet another fantasy as he elevated my head and lanced my throat with his magnificent glory. 

My eyes rolled back as I was impaled between the two Trojan gods. I feared I would perish under the dual ravishment, and I accepted my fate. In perfect harmony, they strove to drive me to the point of hedonistic exhaustion. A fine sheen developed on our bodies, and the bawdy sounds of bodies smacking in unreserved passion filled the bedroom. Still, I moaned, working the monolith buried in my throat as I pressed backward into the Lieutenant’s unflagging onslaught. 

Words floated through my ears. I struggled to decipher their meaning. The audacious Lieutenant repeated the words, and I perceived there was a question in the sentence. I must have had a blank look on my face, and my Inner Goddess felt like a moron as he patiently repeated the question once more. This time, a bold thumb swirled my…umm, rose. I blanched – not there!! My Inner Goddess clapped her hands at the idea and shouted her encouragement. The heat of the moment almost convinced me to acquiesce to the request as my Inner Goddess flooded my imagination with all the positions possible if I JUST said yes. Luckily, I retained just enough mental fortitude to, hopefully, politely decline. I had no preparation, no experience in almost two years but most importantly, I had promised Jack he would be my first. Needless to say, if my Inner Goddess had any say in the matter, it would not be long before I found myself deliciously gorged in every conceivable way. The Lieutenant was indeed profoundly understanding and amiable, resuming his aggressive cannonade with staggering precision. Again, I entrusted my body to the enthralling orgasms he engendered. 

At some point (my consciousness shattered), my tireless Jack and the intrepid Lieutenant switched positions. My Inner Goddess, in full command, was resolved to prove her merit to each gentleman, pleasuring and relishing them with boundless zeal. Hips still propped on the Ramp, my fingers wrapped around the Lieutenant’s slick obelisk, my tongue quickly washing away the tart protection residue and teasing the prominent crown that had invoked so many of my orgasms. I loudly moaned as I drew him into the dark recesses of my throat, loving the thick fullness of the Lieutenant’s glory. Jack took that precise moment to delve into the furthest reaches of my petite form, nearly strafing my inner gate with each piercing thrust. 

Orgasm after delirious orgasm spawned from their Herculean exertion. Both gentlemen displayed astounding conditioning, their intense devotion causing me to reach into my very core for strength to match their vigor. My body strained as my soul took flight. Did their strength and glories know no bounds?! 

In time, I sensed the undeniable energy shift around the Lieutenant. Positioned on my left, I craned my head over my shoulder as I edged him, my tongue stimulating each sensitive inch. Absolutely every muscle of his impressive body grew taut and rigid. His fingers screwed around my sapphire tendrils, fashioning the length into a makeshift ponytail. Above me, his breath came in stilted puffs. My Inner Goddess sparkled in her power. My grip along his shaft tightened as my head bobbed with redoubled exuberance. Jack slowed his rhythm, allowing me to focus all my application on the Lieutenant. 

The captive glory bulged and pulsed within my throat, and I distinguished the first beads of his imminent release. My Inner Goddess bubbled as the Lieutenant grasped his keening, aubergine glory in his mighty fist, stroking with beastly fury as he urged me to take every drop. I extended my tongue, angling it just beneath the throbbing glory. In the delicate recesses of my body, I felt Jack pulse, his rotund crown striking against my inner jewel. The mischievous rogue! It took an enormous amount of willpower to restrain my Inner Goddess from bursting like a pent-up guizer. Our attention was meant to be on the Lieutenant, not our millionth orgasm. And just like that, cream ropes fountained in volcanic emanation. I closed my eyes, allowing his essence to fill my mouth and run down the corner of my lips onto the silky sheets. 

I licked my lips with a triumphant grin as the last drops trickled away. As the nearly depleted Lieutenant rested back on his heels, Jack reinforced his grip on my waist and concentrated his volatile offensive. I felt the threads of the bedsheets snap as I vainly clung to my mortality. Jack negotiated my ankles onto his shoulders. Only then did I notice the Ramp was no longer on the bed. I would have concerned myself about its whereabouts, but Jack had other plans. 

My Love had been patient long enough. With reckless abandon and fuelled with manic strength, Jack drove me nearly to my limits as he bent me in half. Producing the uttermost orgasms and sonorous sounds, I was forced to stuff the bedding between my teeth in an ineffective attempt to stifle my cries. As one, we shattered into nothingness, souls entwined as wisps of smoke. 

Fully expended at last, the three of us reclined on the damp and rumpled linens. My Inner Goddess was puckishly delighted to discover she was once more loosely wedged between Jack and the Lieutenant. She is inexorably incorrigible. As the gentlemen chatted, their hands tracing my body once more, I sighed at my Inner Goddess and in esoteric nirvana. The affair had gone off without an awkward hitch! To my knowledge, I had not messed up nor ruined anything! I exhaled and sleepily closed my eyes as peace settled over the room. 

After a time, the conversation turned to me inquiring as to my state and desires. Physically, my body sought the sanguine realm of the Dream Lord. Mentally, my rapacious Inner Goddess was intrigued. Were either or both gentlemen braced for round two? Was it actually round two or twelve? To her merriment, the plucky Lieutenant was inclined to partake in one more escapade, desiring to coat my embroidered breasts with his manifestation. My Inner Goddess jumped up and down. We had a satyric trick up our sleeve. 

The potent Lieutenant kneeled on my right, pampering his tremendous glory. Laying back, I fondled first one breast and then the second, lightly pinching and teasing each nipple until the nubs rose in erect attention. The strokes gained speed as his breath came in shorter and shorter bursts. I persisted in teasing and flicking my breasts for the Lieutenant’s amusement. Behind me, Jack’s fingers spoiled and pampered my hyperacute skin, adding to the sensuality of the engagement. 

When I perceived the time to be correct, I played my final card. Tucking my chin to my sternum, I pressed my right breast upward so my tongue might dart from between my pink lips to flirt with my perky nipple and dance around my areola. The growling baritone caused my Inner Goddess to flush a deep crimson and expand her efforts. In good time, milky strains dolloped my ample mounds. My grin spread from ear to ear as I spread the hot nectar over the surface of my flesh with the pad of my thumb. My Inner Goddess was exceedingly impressed, taking special note of the Lieutenant’s talented capacity for multiple releases in a single interlude. 

Eventually, we gathered ourselves and rose from the bed, though I am certain none of us were restored to full power. Greedily, we stood around the dining room table, munching the blueberry muffins I had prepared earlier that morning and popping tart green grapes. Armed with a second muffin, a banana for potassium, and a bottle of water, we bid the exceptional Lieutenant adieu. I bit my lip as I closed the door, hoping the experience had been as satisfying and thrilling for him as it had been for me.

Entering the bedroom again, incredulously, my body languidly dropped to the mattress. The whole thing was nearly inconceivable! Thanks to Jack’s incontestable prowess, extensive knowledge, and willingness to engineer the events, I had just partaken in my mind’s secret fantasy! The Fates had truly gone above and beyond manipulating the threads to introduce me to a boyfriend who defied all odds and, unlike my past, fostered my exploration of carnal decadence. 

Head on his naked chest, I cuddle closer, the hum of the oscillating fan and the rhythmic beat of Jack’s heart a calming lullaby. I would never tire of nestling my sapped and lethargic body against him while the memories of our torrid affair flickered freshly on my mind. My Inner Goddess glowed with an unquenchable light. 

“I love you,” I murmured as sleep drew close. 

Jack stroked my temple and embraced the holy place on my forehead. He tenderly cradled my soul, kissing the very tip of my nose before whispering, “I love you, too.”

Until next time, XO. Elsie